Strategic Pessimism Is My Way of Life
(Muh. Syahrul Padli — Refection Series)
The time of optimism is over for me. The time when I saw everything through Mario Teguh’s optimistic way of thinking. It’s the time when I felt I could hold the world in my hands with effort and hard work. It’s the time when I thought that privilege played no role. In that time, I was a person who saw the future as a large stone that could be carved and shaped with consistencywith following my passion.
Now the time of measured pessimism has come. The time when almost everything I see through Mark Manson’s glasses, who is indifferent to things that are beyond my control. In this time, I am learning to control my expectations and learn to be more realistic.
In addition, the meaning that I give to an event is also tried to be as it is. No judgment is made at the beginning or in the end. Even I will not make a judgment if an event or something is related to me directly or indirectly.
This change in perspective happened because I was hit by reality that made me realize that optimism is not helpful and sometimes potentially causes mental injury. This does not mean that it applies to everyone. This does not mean that having an optimistic perspective is bad. This is just a matter of compatibility. There are those who are suitable for optimism and those who are not. There are those who are helped by their optimism and those who are burdened. I am one of those who are not suited for optimism.
My high expectations that are not fulfilled cannot all be accepted with an open heart. It is easier for me to accept failure if from the beginning I do not expect anything at all or even expect the worst.
Unfulfilled expectations are a source of heartbreak and negative emotions. People who are not born with strong mental privilege or live in a rich family or have many business connections, don’t expect anything fancy in life. Because the bad effect of something that is not achieved, maybe, is the desire to take one’s own life.
I don’t have an internal support system that can pull me out of the pool of despair when I am plunged into reality by big and small failures. Some of the closest people in my social environment do not appreciate failure as a process. I am scolded when I make a mistake, so a thorn is stuck in my subconscious mind that is getting bigger and bigger, widening the wound and causing infection.
I’m sure there are a few people out there who are like me, who take the path of pessimism as a pain reliever from the unpleasantness of failure. Especially failing on the path you choose yourself.
Not all of us who are equipped with optimism can achieve our dreams. Not all of us who are equipped with pessimism fail to achieve what we long for. There are so many people who are optimistic about life and fall on the path they choose. There are a few people who succeed in their goals with pessimism. The problem of success and failure is perhaps very unique. Every person has their own experiences. It’s different for each person.
Pessimism in the right place is very helpful for us to live better with a lighter burden of thought. I am pessimistic that this pandemic will end tomorrow. This pessimism is what I think is categorized as a strategic pessimis because indeed being pessimistic about impossible things makes us see life according to our capacity as humans, as one of the cogs that drives the food chain and evolutionary cycle.
I am also optimistic that this pandemic will not end tomorrow. This optimism is what I think is right because in fact a pandemic that is not properly handled at the national or regional level will never end. Asymptomatic patients will roam and become vectors of the endless cycle until there is a large-scale community immunity.
Forgive my uncomplete definition with absurd examples. Perhaps, it is not the right optimism and pessimism that will make life more stable, but our acceptance of all events as they are. But acceptance is clearly gained from the awareness of life as it is.
I can accept reality precisely with pessimism earlier. The pessimistic attitude that I hold is slightly different from general pessimism. I hold a view called strategic pessimism. This type of pessimism strives to achieve a goal as best it can but conditions the mind to be prepared for the worst outcome.
Why should you condition your mind to be prepared for the worst outcome? Well, because hope for the best outcome is poison for this uncertain life.
